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The goals-only competition.
The goals-only competition.
Third consecutive title shows Dirty Dunc knows his onions!
Third consecutive title shows Dirty Dunc knows his onions!
Duncity United 1 Sardine City 0
Duncity United 1 Sardine City 0
This result may look like the product of a dull game but in the end what it lacked in goals and quality it made up for in controversy and tension. The first spark of excitement was when Harry Kane came excruciatingly close to getting something on a goal-bound cross. The BBC wrongly reported this as 'KANE SCORES AGAIN!'. Bugs Birney was quick to piss on Dirty Dunc's bonfire by saying that most other sources said he didn't get a touch. So it stayed 0-0 and unsurprisingly the Duncity manager came up with the same old conspiracy theories. We shouldn't have been surprised at the stalemate as both teams, other than Sardine's pulverising of Fruitcake in the semi final, had just about scraped through every other game in the competition.
What happened next was to show us that it certainly wasn't going to be Sardine's weekend. The Fishmen had already lost the services of Mo Salah, their 29-goal hero and now here was their second-highest goalscorer, Raheem Sterling, missing chance, after chance, after chance, after golden opportunity. With time running out and plans already being made for the replay, the man from Guadalajara, Javier Hernández Balcázar, or Chicharito (Little Pea) drove the ball into the corner of the net with just 17 minutes of the weekend remaining.
The victory is Duncity United's third consecutive Onion Bag Cup title after 3-2 defeat of Armitage Shankers last year and a thumping 4-0 win over Taxbore Wanderers the season before.
Another Onion Bag cup title for the cad in the hat.
Wandering Dog 1 Duncity United 2
Dirty Dunc stayed on course to win a third successive Onion Bag Cup with a win over a Dog side that have found goals hard to come by of late. There must have been mixed feelings for Scott as Kane's towering header gave Duncity the lead but helped his beloved Spurs defeat the Gunners. Mexican forward Hernandez doubled the lead for Duncity but Niasse's headed goal gave Wandering Dog some hope but the equaliser never came.
Somerset Fruitcakes 0 Sardine City 3
These two old rivals have bumped into each other on many occasions over the last 12 months and it's never pretty. Sardine certainly has the upper hand in these clashes at the moment this was a one-sided affair. Izquierdo slotted home the opener which was followed by Sterling's goal and another from the prolific Salah. There was to be no reply from the Fruitcakes and now Sardine City have the chance to add the Onion Bag to the Tosspot League title they won earlier this season.
Group Stage Results
Group Stage Results
19-25 December 2017
19-25 December 2017
Group A
Wandering Dog 0 FC Bugs Bunnies 1
C NUT FC 2 Croydon Casuals 0
Group B
Smegma United 1 Mighty Wanderer 1
Group C
Somerset Fruitcakes 4 Ctrl Alt De Leat 0
Group D
Armitage Shankers 3 Duncity United 4
9-15 January 2018
9-15 January 2018
Group A
C NUT FC 1 Wandering Dog 3
Croydon Casuals 1 FC Bugs Bunnies 0
Group B
Mighty Wanderer 3 Sardine City 4
Group C
Ctrl Alt De Leat 5 Taxbore Wanderers 1
Group D
Duncity United 3 Lee FC 2
16-22 January 2018
16-22 January 2018
Group A
Wandering Dog 2 Croydon Casuals 0
FC Bugs Bunnies 2 C NUT FC 4
Group B
Sardine City 0 Smegma United 0
Group C
Taxbore Wanderers 0 Somerset Fruitcakes 1
Group D
Lee FC 1 Armitage Shankers 4
Group Tables
Group Tables
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