Tosspot League 2018/19

Sterling performance secures first Tosspot title for Fruitcake

Matchset 9 Report

In what was a fantastic finale to a gripping contest between Fruitcake and Tam Tuff it was a player who was much berated during the World Cup that tipped the balance. Somerset’s Sterling finished off any hope of a comeback by the Smeggers with a superb performance, scoring two goals and two assists. The SSPA’s current top points scorer, Wilson, started the ball rolling for the Fruitcakes with his sixth goal of the season. Arnautovic equalised for Smegma but things soon began to go wrong for Tuff’s team. England hero, Maguire, hobbled off the pitch to be denied a clean sheet and then Anderson, Wood and Anderson again scored three quick-fire goals to put the Cakes into a commanding 12-3 lead. An Iwobi assist offered hope to Tuff and then Moura cut the lead down further with a well-placed header going into half-time. Then came the Sterling show as he had a hand in four goals, scoring two of them. Somewhere in the middle of that, Silva offered resistance but all the while McCarthy of the Smeggers was getting mullered. With the score now 22-6 in favour of the Fruitcakes Hazard piled on the agony with an assist. However, Alonso closed the gap a little with an assist that also brought minus two to Sakho of the Cakes to make it 22-8. Sessegnon needed to score five goals to clinch it for Smegma United but he didn’t have a sniff so Somerset Fruitcakes won the Tosspot League. In a cruel twist of fate, victories for Wandering Dog and Taxbore Wanderers mean Tam Tuff slipped to fourth place. Scott E’s thrashing of the Ginga Ninja not only secured the runner-up spot for the third consecutive season, it also condemned Strawberry Allstars to bottom place. Laughing Glavesy ended up third for the second year running after her win over the previous champion, Sardine. The Fishmen finished next -to-bottom after recording a superior points-difference to the Allstars. Dirty Duncan will have been pleased as he played his Get Out of Jail Free card at Gash Lane where C NUT fans had turned up en masse to witness the demise of Duncity only to go home disappointed after a 10-5 defeat.